FRANCHISE EMPLOYEE AGREEMENT

Franchise ID: 003138-B
Location: Longsaddle (Barn Office, behind the cow pasture)
Date of Contract Initiation: _______

This document hereby certifies the induction of the undersigned into official employment with Acquisitions Incorporated, hereinafter referred to as "The Company", under the stewardship of the Franchisee, currently operated by: ___________________ (Franchise Lead)

I. TERMS OF SERVICE

The Employee (that’s you) agrees to:

• Uphold the mission and brand image of Acquisitions Incorporated (™).
• Undertake tasks, quests, contracts, and errands deemed profitable, brand-forward, or mildly heroic by the Franchise Lead.
• Refrain from slaying clients, investors, or internal staff without approval.
• Maintain proper log entries when possible (blood stains acceptable where necessary).

II. COMPENSATION

• Base Pay: Equal share of adventuring profits after Company cut (40% or 60% depending on how you interpret clause 12.b.iv).
• Perks Include:
  • Access to HQ facilities (shelter, table snacks, trapdoor hiding)
  • Franchise discounts at partner vendors (if any exist nearby)
  • Eligibility for future magical branding tattoos (pending budget)

III. EQUIPMENT POLICY

All standard-issue Acq Inc gear (if issued) remains property of the Company unless:

• Lost in combat (with receipts),
• Repurposed for heroism (debatable),
• Used as bribes (discouraged, but historically effective)

IV. DEATH AND RESURRECTION

In the regrettable event of untimely demise:

• The Company may pursue resurrection if:
  • Funds are available
  • Body is mostly intact
  • Employee is deemed “brand essential” at time of death
• Otherwise, a 10% royalty from the resale of your gear may be donated to your next of kin or rival.

V. ADDITIONAL CLAUSES

• Employees may not start their own franchise within 250 miles without proper forms and fees.
• Use of the Service Bell is not to summon snacks, wish fulfillment, or non-emergency ghost banishment.
• You agree to be occasionally referred to as “the help,” “junior associate,” or “provisional operative.”

VI. SIGNATURES

By signing below, you affirm that you have read, understand, and probably did not fully read this agreement, but you’re okay with it anyway.

Employee Name: _________________________
Race/Class: _____________________________
Signature (or Mark): _____________________

Franchise Lead: __________________________
Majordomo Approval (Clockett): [ ] Initialed